Thursday, February 17, 2011

Grief can turn into Joy.

I should not be up right now.  I sat down to start my blog posting at 10:30pm, but I am almost embarassed that the time this will be posted...don't look.  I usually catch up on my facebook, read others blogs, and pray before I start my blog.  After the day I had today, I thought I was certain of my blogpost for the evening until a facebook post rocked my world.  This friend had originally shared the story of The Sullivans just days before Sara's passing seeking prayer requests.  Even though I do not know them, I prayed, celebrated and grieved with them by following their blog.  For some reason...maybe just the excuse of life and my own pregnancy...I had stopped reading the blog.  Well, I missed out on a lot of blessings.  However, the great thing is that I was able to spend several hours tonight catching up by reading the blog, watching videos and reading articles.  The new chapters to their story brought even more tears...happy ones this time. I was so thankful and blessed that my friend had reposted this update to their lives.  It was fun to read and see how God answers prayer and how He alone can turn grief into joy. He is in control.  It will take me days to truly reflect, appreciate, and learn what God wants to teach me through their situation, but there are several things that already stand out to me.

"For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are my ways your ways," declares the Lord. "As the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways and my thoughts that your thoughts."
--Isaiah 55:8-9

There are things this side of heaven that we will just not understand.  I must remember that God is sovereign.  I am learning the meaning of this more and more.  God is in control, and I am so thankful that I can rest in that daily.  It is interesting that in the same thought that I can think that I do not understand, I can also reflect and see a bigger picture of how the Lord works and uses these misunderstandings to bring so many others to Him and, more importantly, bring Him Glory.  I am increasingly thankful and grateful that the Lord allows us to reflect on the past and at times see glimpes of His purposes and workings in our lives.  When times are tough that is sometimes one of the things I hold on to; the ability that down the road I can look back and say okay Lord I know that you were doing much bigger things than I could see or understand at the time.

Behold, children are a gift from the Lord. The fruit of the womb is a reward. --Psalm 127:3


Just a reminder what incredible blessings and gifts children are.  I love how Jesus loved the children and wanted them to come to Him.  I love that children are each born with the incredible gift of bringing laughter, joy, and even healing to us without even knowing the profound impact they are having.  They are so dependent on us for survival, yet at the same time they are selfless, humble servants in their own special way.


All the days ordained for me were written in your book before one of them came to be. --Psalm 139:16

Our days are numbered.  In Psalm 39 David asks for the Lord to show him his life's end and the number of days to let him know how fleeting his life is.  He continues that his days are a mere handbreath and the span of his years is as nothing before the Lord.  Further into the same Psalm, David proclaims that his hope is in the Lord.  James further reminds me that we are but a mist that appears for a little while and then vanishes.  I am thankful that I do not know the number of my days or my family's days.  I guess if I did know, then it would make each day more important or pressing.  Why do I not already live this way?  Life is short and precious here on earth, and I am privileged to be able to enjoy it even though I know the beauty of heaven is unfathomable.  I will live life to the fullest.  I will not worry about tomorrow because I am not even promised tomorrow.  I will follow the dreams the Lord has placed on my heart.  I will choose to be joyful and thankful in all circumstances.  I will trust in the provision of the Lord and obey His law.  I will give forgiveness even if I am not asked for it.  I will love the Lord with all of my heart, soul and mind.  I will model and pass these things on as a legacy to my children.  And when my flesh fails and falls short, I will humbly approach the Lord thankful that He is faithful and His mercies are new every morning.

A brief, but extremely inspirational, video about Sullivan's Journey is below.  The Sullivan family blog can be viewed at http://www.bandssullivan.blogspot.com/.  I encourage you to check it out.  Sara's life is still impacting so many almost a year and half after her passing.  Her husband, Brady, shares with a sincere and honest transparency that is also extremely inspirational.  I did not know Sara, but I think if our paths had ever crossed we could have been good friends.  I am also so encouraged with the way the Lord has given comfort and healing through the encouragement of His body of believers and a new love and growing family.




(Okay so that last paragraph kind of sounded like what would be written on the back cover of a dramatic/romantic/inspirational novel.  That was so unintentional, but can you not tell that I have been touched? I think I need to go to bed...)

Only By God's Grace will I feel rested in the morning :-)
With Much Love,
Callie Ann

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