The Lord is teaching me so vividly these days that boys will be boys. I am learning to appreciate them so much, and boy do I love my boys. I have discovered a great appreciation for their laughter, creativity, loyalty, passion, messiness, how they forgive and forget, the importance of physical touch (the rough kind as well as the gentle, but all loving), and their amazing energy. I have always claimed to be the "clean mom" because I did not like to deal with messes. I now find that I am much more relaxed in this area, and if they are dirty then I know they are having fun and being just as God designed them to be.
Basketball is quite popular in our house right now. Have I mentioned that our Women's Aggie Basketball team are the 2011 NCAA National Champions?!? I know I have not on the blog, and I will not try to annoy with it, but we are quite excited and pumped for those ladies. Did you know they held Bible Studies during the tournament, and that Danielle Adams even made this clear to the media. I know, I know we always hear thanks to God, and that is great. I do not downplay that at all, after all, God should always get the glory. However, how often do they go to the extent to mention that even Bible Studies were held? Amazing. I love that Coach Blair and these ladies are such great ambassadors to the sport, to our great school, and most of all great role models for our children. I know I went on a tangent...
Basketball is quite popular in our house right now, and it does have a lot to do with how we follow both the men's and women's Aggie programs. (We do not follow the NBA, except during the playoffs.) Calvin loves to play for hours outside on the big goal, and Colton tries really hard. He loves to be lifted up so that he can dunk it. Colton did get a small basketball goal from GaGa and PawPaw for his birthday present. Right now it is inside the house where there is pandemonium going on. I just know something is going to get broken, but I am not in the least worried about it. If you are ever at my house for an extended period of time, you will soon find out that there is always balls being thrown or shot inside. We have the middle of our living room floor open on purpose so that football routes can be more easily run. When Calvin was three we did have to stop the ball tosses and swinging of the bat. He was just too good, and it was getting dangerous even with the "soft" balls.
Before the basketball goal was assembled, there were makeshift goals being created out of anything that resembled a hole. They following is a list of what I can remember has been used as basketball goals: laundry baskets, the seat of Kylee's jumperoo, the boppy pillow set in the recliner seat, Colton's stool that goes in his room and the lid comes off, a cardboard box, the highchair, the cute tin tub that holds the dog's toys, and various toy bins. I know there are more that I am missing, but I think the point has been made. The sheer creativity, love of sports, and energy that lives in my house is inspiring. I try to hang, but I need to inhale some of their energy. If I could bottle it, I would be a millionaire.
I have partially figured out what needs to be put in the bottle, but I am not sure how to get it there. I would put in children's pure innocence. The joys and lack of stress that they live in allow for energy to multiply. It makes me so sad and sick to think of all of the rough situations some children have at home that they are simply forced to grow up too soon in order to survive, and the joy and stress-free life of innocence is robbed from them.
Some things would not need to be bottled. These are things that I am able to change, but choose not to or do not do well enough. These would be things like drinking lots of water, not drinking sodas, eating more nutritiously, cutting out majority of sugar, exercise more and get the proper amount of rest. I do well at some of these and poorly in others, but I really think they all work together. Therefore, if I am missing any piece of the puzzle, then I am missing out on the whole. I know this whole paragraph was like blah, blah, blah. The boring things we always hear, know, and disregard.
I am so thankful that the Lord blessed me with boys! I am also so grateful that I enjoy them for the way God created them to be. It sure would be boring around our house if I did not allow them to be boys.
Something else to note: When Kevin gets involved with the boys, he is one of the boys. The competition revs up. The energy increases. And it always gets physical. As I was typing that I thought of the Olivia Newton John song, which is a totally different kind of physical. The Mommy and Daddy kind where wrestling ensues.
Only By God's Grace...
Callie Ann
Wednesday, April 6, 2011
Tuesday, March 29, 2011
A Portrait Studio Adventure
I am not a fan of going to the portrait studio. I prefer for us to take our own because Kevin has the talent with my creativity to do it. However, every now and then I make the trip to the studio. It is not really that I hate the results because the kids took some great portraits today, but it is the process that I am not fond of. We managed to get some really beautiful pictures today at Sears of all places. I get a little flustered because I feel rushed during the whole process, yet it takes for-ev-er. We go in all happy and excited to take beautiful pictures and usually come out tired and hungry.
We had to go to Sears because of a decision I made nine years ago. I had the twins pictures taken in the tin tub with the cloud background and yellow duckies. I really love those pictures and they grace the kids bathroom wall. I repeated the procedure with Colton so it would not look right to not have sweet Kylee's face up there as well. So we packed up and went to Sears for the infamous "tub" picture.
I will now have all four tub pictures on the bathroom wall. It will be complete. I also decided to go ahead and take Kylee's picture in her beautiful dedication gown. I am so glad I did. There are so many of these that I love, but here are a few.
I am really glad I had these taken because we are finally having her dedication this Sunday, and now I have a beautiful picture to submit for it. The old saying is true that the more children you have the less pictures you have of them. Well, I have a lot of snapshots, but I hardly have any great portraits of Kylee or Colton. I think the twins had theirs taken every 2 or 3 months their first year of life. Here a few more of my favorites from today.
I will say that I love the fact that I came home with a cd of 78 pictures!! The moral of the story is now that I am not feeling the frazzlement of going to the studio, I am so happy to have these pictures. The photo session itself was tiring and I was sweating by the end of it, but Colton and Kylee were both happy. The worst part is trying to make all of the decisions at the computer after the session with the pressure of needing to make the right decisions all while your older son is running up and down the hall with the football prop you had brought and a baby wanting to sleep. Colton decided that it would be a great idea to try and make baskets with the quilt rack they had displaying products. I let him know that was not a very good idea, and he obeyed. However, then he had to find other things to keep him entertained. I mean what fun is it for an active boy to have to sit patiently and wait while Mommy makes portrait decisions. Kylee did not cry, she just sucked on her fingers and every now and then would politely vocalize her desire to leave. I have developed a list of places for anyone needing natural birth control, and this is on it. My children were not horrible, but I did not even mention the other crying and bored children that we witnessed. I decided to order the minimum and get the cd so that I could make better decisions at home.
All of this for cherished memories. Memories of ages of my precious children that I can never get back. I am sad when I think of how fast they are growing, yet I love every new development and accomplishment they make. Another day gone, but there are so many more memories to make tomorrow!
I was not going to blog about it, but I simply cannot sign off without voicing my pride in my Lady Aggies Basketball team! They are headed to the Final Four for the first time in program history! Whoop!
Only By God's Grace...
Callie Ann
We had to go to Sears because of a decision I made nine years ago. I had the twins pictures taken in the tin tub with the cloud background and yellow duckies. I really love those pictures and they grace the kids bathroom wall. I repeated the procedure with Colton so it would not look right to not have sweet Kylee's face up there as well. So we packed up and went to Sears for the infamous "tub" picture.
I will now have all four tub pictures on the bathroom wall. It will be complete. I also decided to go ahead and take Kylee's picture in her beautiful dedication gown. I am so glad I did. There are so many of these that I love, but here are a few.
I am really glad I had these taken because we are finally having her dedication this Sunday, and now I have a beautiful picture to submit for it. The old saying is true that the more children you have the less pictures you have of them. Well, I have a lot of snapshots, but I hardly have any great portraits of Kylee or Colton. I think the twins had theirs taken every 2 or 3 months their first year of life. Here a few more of my favorites from today.
I will say that I love the fact that I came home with a cd of 78 pictures!! The moral of the story is now that I am not feeling the frazzlement of going to the studio, I am so happy to have these pictures. The photo session itself was tiring and I was sweating by the end of it, but Colton and Kylee were both happy. The worst part is trying to make all of the decisions at the computer after the session with the pressure of needing to make the right decisions all while your older son is running up and down the hall with the football prop you had brought and a baby wanting to sleep. Colton decided that it would be a great idea to try and make baskets with the quilt rack they had displaying products. I let him know that was not a very good idea, and he obeyed. However, then he had to find other things to keep him entertained. I mean what fun is it for an active boy to have to sit patiently and wait while Mommy makes portrait decisions. Kylee did not cry, she just sucked on her fingers and every now and then would politely vocalize her desire to leave. I have developed a list of places for anyone needing natural birth control, and this is on it. My children were not horrible, but I did not even mention the other crying and bored children that we witnessed. I decided to order the minimum and get the cd so that I could make better decisions at home.
All of this for cherished memories. Memories of ages of my precious children that I can never get back. I am sad when I think of how fast they are growing, yet I love every new development and accomplishment they make. Another day gone, but there are so many more memories to make tomorrow!
I was not going to blog about it, but I simply cannot sign off without voicing my pride in my Lady Aggies Basketball team! They are headed to the Final Four for the first time in program history! Whoop!
Only By God's Grace...
Callie Ann
Monday, March 28, 2011
A Big Ash Mess from Mt. Haas
It has been another break in blog posting, but this time it was not because of lack of internet!! We visited family over Spring Break, and then it has taken me a little over a week to catch up. The bad news is I am not caught up, and the truth is that I probably never will be. I then imposed a ban until my taxes were finished. So here I am.
We had a big ash mess on Friday. I thought I would blog this on Saturday, but my coals were not through smouldering. I am completely cool now. Let me create the scene.
Mommy has left her children in the living room watching Toy Story 3. I have done this on many an occasion while I try to get something done just one wall over with the door open. I do not like to make it a habit, but sometimes business must be taken care of. I realize it is not my TWO 9 year olds responsibilities to fully take care of the siblings; however, I would hope they are old enough to report to me an emergency situation. (I must insert here that most of the time they are wonderful at short-term supervision, and they have never had a lapse in judgement such as this. I might not have written this whilst I was still smouldering, but time has allowed me to put things into perspective.) I would have thought that the eruption of Mt. Haas, err..should I say Mt. Colton Haas, would justify as an emergency. On this day, it did not.
Make special note here that said Mommy had only had a couple of hours of sleep the night before. She had also only had very limited hours of sleep that week for various reasons. I was also on a deadline. I had met other deadlines throughout the week, but this one was pushing it. This would tell you that said Mommy was low on sleep, low on nutrition, low on patience...well, I am sure this is not unlike anyone else in the world at many times in their lives. So I am sure the feeling is well understood.
I go in to check on the kids several times, and at quick glance all appears well. (There were no lights on in the room and shades mostly down to watch the movie.) Finally, I go in because I am supposed to get Kevlie Ann to a birthday party, and we still needed to get a gift. When the lights came on, I saw the complete destruction that had been hidden in the darkness. My creative and train-loving son, Colton, had decided that the fireplace ashes made for great steam and smoke! The ground was covered in at least a 1/4 inch of ash. Kylee's jumperoo and toys were covered. The windowsill was covered. The ash even made it on to the mantle and entertainment center and on my drapes. There was ash on the furniture and even up and down the long entryway hall and table. I can be guilty of some embellishment at times, but I am not exaggerating at all. In my boggled state, I did stop to take pictures. I have proof. (You will notice that I had already started cleaning before the pics were taken.)
I am happy to report that not a single spanking was given. This power to refrain from corporal punishment only came from Christ. I was furious and absolutely beside myself at why nobody bothered to report this situation. I kept reminding myself that someday I would laugh at this situation, but that did not help.
I will confess that a story told by Dottie McDowell is what immediately came to my mind. I had listened to this story a couple of weeks prior. Dottie shared that when she was a little girl one of her favorite stories was Peter Pan. She loved the fact that Tinkerbell could just sprinkle a little pixie dust and things could fly. One day she went down to the basement and had a great idea. The laundry detergent would make great pixie dust. She proceeded to grab it by the handful and throw it up in the air like pixie dust until the entire box was empty. When her Mom came down to check on her and saw the mess; she laughed. She proceeded to ask Dottie what she was doing, then asked her to re-enact it for her. Later, they happily cleaned it up together. During the story, Dottie mentions that most moms would have erupted with some or all of the following (in elevated voices I might add): What were you thinking? Look at this huge mess I have to clean up. I don't have time for this. Do you know how much it is going to cost me to replace that detergent? I remember thinking while listening to the story that I was not Dottie's kind of mom. The what most moms would say fit me perfectly, but I sure thought I would like to be more like Dottie's Mom. I would love to see the fun from my child's perspective. I would love to remain joyful. I would love to not be frustrated because of all of the extra work I did not have time for now existed. I actually prayed that evening for help in becoming more of the Mommy that I desired to be. I remember sharing and discussing this story with the older kids while cooking dinner the night after I heard it. I even shared it with with a close friend a few days later. I am extremely grateful and blessed that I had taken the time to listen to Josh & Dottie McDowell's cds. I fully believe that was a part of Christ armoring and preparing me with a true story that pierced my heart.
I realize now that this Mt. Haas eruption was an answer to my prayer and yet another Mommy Growth Test, and I passed. I did not make an A or maybe not even a B, but I definitely passed. I definitely did not laugh. I definitely did not ask for a reenactment at that moment. After all, Dottie's was a cleaning agent in a basement, and this was ash in our living room. My voice did elevate, but I did not scream and yell and rant and rave. My initial punishment that I spoke was that all children would remain in their bedrooms for the remainder of the weekend. I soon realized (with the help of my Mom) that was a little harsh, but it was the fresh, real, non-threatening reaction that I spouted off in my frustration. I shared with Kevin about the big ash mess, and he thought it was absolutely hilarious. If he had been here, he would not have been laughing. However, it was nice to hear him laughing about it away from the situation. I kindly reminded him that the next time something like this happens, because it will happen again, that I expect the same laughing reaction. Not much cleaning was accomplished that evening; however, the next day my Mom was able to help a little. Kevin also came home and joyfully jumped right in and became my knight in shining armor. He enlisted the kids help, and I think they actually had a fun time cleaning up the ash. I have pictures of this too.
Later in the evening on the day of the eruption, Colton, humbly came to me and said he was so sorry. We had a great talk, and I was so very thankful that I had remained somewhat calm during the severity of my frustration. I am so grateful that I was merciful and tenderhearted to that sweet boy, and that I did not crush his spirit or creativeness by becoming a harsh, venom-spewing Mom that would have only created a different Mt. Haas eruption of sorts. The damaging and regretful kind. He told me that he would never, ever play with ash in any house ever again. When I asked him what exactly he was doing with the ash, his face lit up and he excitedly explained. He was driving his trains through the ash and the steam and smoke was blowing up in the air out of the trains. After he showed me the motions, I imagine it was a very similar to the flinging of the pixie dust. I was also able to remind him that I loved him so much even though there was a huge mess in our living room. I did tell him that I would remind him of this story often so that when he is a father someday, and Mt. Haas erupts in another generation that hopefully he will exhibit the role of a gracious and merciful father just as our Heavenly Father is to us. Although we do not deserve it, grace and mercy is extended each and every day. We will probably find remnants of the ash for the next year, and I am sure that it will serve as a great reminder of grace and mercy.
By the way, because of the break I did not post our memory verse for the 15th. Here it is:
Only By God's Grace...can I survive the big ash mess of Mt. Haas eruptions and be a loving Mommy.
Callie Ann
We had a big ash mess on Friday. I thought I would blog this on Saturday, but my coals were not through smouldering. I am completely cool now. Let me create the scene.
Mommy has left her children in the living room watching Toy Story 3. I have done this on many an occasion while I try to get something done just one wall over with the door open. I do not like to make it a habit, but sometimes business must be taken care of. I realize it is not my TWO 9 year olds responsibilities to fully take care of the siblings; however, I would hope they are old enough to report to me an emergency situation. (I must insert here that most of the time they are wonderful at short-term supervision, and they have never had a lapse in judgement such as this. I might not have written this whilst I was still smouldering, but time has allowed me to put things into perspective.) I would have thought that the eruption of Mt. Haas, err..should I say Mt. Colton Haas, would justify as an emergency. On this day, it did not.
Make special note here that said Mommy had only had a couple of hours of sleep the night before. She had also only had very limited hours of sleep that week for various reasons. I was also on a deadline. I had met other deadlines throughout the week, but this one was pushing it. This would tell you that said Mommy was low on sleep, low on nutrition, low on patience...well, I am sure this is not unlike anyone else in the world at many times in their lives. So I am sure the feeling is well understood.
I go in to check on the kids several times, and at quick glance all appears well. (There were no lights on in the room and shades mostly down to watch the movie.) Finally, I go in because I am supposed to get Kevlie Ann to a birthday party, and we still needed to get a gift. When the lights came on, I saw the complete destruction that had been hidden in the darkness. My creative and train-loving son, Colton, had decided that the fireplace ashes made for great steam and smoke! The ground was covered in at least a 1/4 inch of ash. Kylee's jumperoo and toys were covered. The windowsill was covered. The ash even made it on to the mantle and entertainment center and on my drapes. There was ash on the furniture and even up and down the long entryway hall and table. I can be guilty of some embellishment at times, but I am not exaggerating at all. In my boggled state, I did stop to take pictures. I have proof. (You will notice that I had already started cleaning before the pics were taken.)
I am happy to report that not a single spanking was given. This power to refrain from corporal punishment only came from Christ. I was furious and absolutely beside myself at why nobody bothered to report this situation. I kept reminding myself that someday I would laugh at this situation, but that did not help.
The pic above is proof that I remained calm because he fell asleep during my discovery and frustration of the destruction that had occurred. Wow. I forgot that I had taken this picture.
I will confess that a story told by Dottie McDowell is what immediately came to my mind. I had listened to this story a couple of weeks prior. Dottie shared that when she was a little girl one of her favorite stories was Peter Pan. She loved the fact that Tinkerbell could just sprinkle a little pixie dust and things could fly. One day she went down to the basement and had a great idea. The laundry detergent would make great pixie dust. She proceeded to grab it by the handful and throw it up in the air like pixie dust until the entire box was empty. When her Mom came down to check on her and saw the mess; she laughed. She proceeded to ask Dottie what she was doing, then asked her to re-enact it for her. Later, they happily cleaned it up together. During the story, Dottie mentions that most moms would have erupted with some or all of the following (in elevated voices I might add): What were you thinking? Look at this huge mess I have to clean up. I don't have time for this. Do you know how much it is going to cost me to replace that detergent? I remember thinking while listening to the story that I was not Dottie's kind of mom. The what most moms would say fit me perfectly, but I sure thought I would like to be more like Dottie's Mom. I would love to see the fun from my child's perspective. I would love to remain joyful. I would love to not be frustrated because of all of the extra work I did not have time for now existed. I actually prayed that evening for help in becoming more of the Mommy that I desired to be. I remember sharing and discussing this story with the older kids while cooking dinner the night after I heard it. I even shared it with with a close friend a few days later. I am extremely grateful and blessed that I had taken the time to listen to Josh & Dottie McDowell's cds. I fully believe that was a part of Christ armoring and preparing me with a true story that pierced my heart.
I realize now that this Mt. Haas eruption was an answer to my prayer and yet another Mommy Growth Test, and I passed. I did not make an A or maybe not even a B, but I definitely passed. I definitely did not laugh. I definitely did not ask for a reenactment at that moment. After all, Dottie's was a cleaning agent in a basement, and this was ash in our living room. My voice did elevate, but I did not scream and yell and rant and rave. My initial punishment that I spoke was that all children would remain in their bedrooms for the remainder of the weekend. I soon realized (with the help of my Mom) that was a little harsh, but it was the fresh, real, non-threatening reaction that I spouted off in my frustration. I shared with Kevin about the big ash mess, and he thought it was absolutely hilarious. If he had been here, he would not have been laughing. However, it was nice to hear him laughing about it away from the situation. I kindly reminded him that the next time something like this happens, because it will happen again, that I expect the same laughing reaction. Not much cleaning was accomplished that evening; however, the next day my Mom was able to help a little. Kevin also came home and joyfully jumped right in and became my knight in shining armor. He enlisted the kids help, and I think they actually had a fun time cleaning up the ash. I have pictures of this too.
I am so glad I took these. They really did enjoy going through 2 bottles of clorox wipes. Notice the bag on the fireplace...it has a lot of ash in it which did not include a couple more emptyings of the dyson...or the shop vac below. I am so glad Kevin brought in the shop vac, but I must say the dyson is awesome. We had to fully disassemble it and thoroughly wash it and all the filters out, but it is a great vacuum.
Later in the evening on the day of the eruption, Colton, humbly came to me and said he was so sorry. We had a great talk, and I was so very thankful that I had remained somewhat calm during the severity of my frustration. I am so grateful that I was merciful and tenderhearted to that sweet boy, and that I did not crush his spirit or creativeness by becoming a harsh, venom-spewing Mom that would have only created a different Mt. Haas eruption of sorts. The damaging and regretful kind. He told me that he would never, ever play with ash in any house ever again. When I asked him what exactly he was doing with the ash, his face lit up and he excitedly explained. He was driving his trains through the ash and the steam and smoke was blowing up in the air out of the trains. After he showed me the motions, I imagine it was a very similar to the flinging of the pixie dust. I was also able to remind him that I loved him so much even though there was a huge mess in our living room. I did tell him that I would remind him of this story often so that when he is a father someday, and Mt. Haas erupts in another generation that hopefully he will exhibit the role of a gracious and merciful father just as our Heavenly Father is to us. Although we do not deserve it, grace and mercy is extended each and every day. We will probably find remnants of the ash for the next year, and I am sure that it will serve as a great reminder of grace and mercy.
By the way, because of the break I did not post our memory verse for the 15th. Here it is:
Be completely humble and gentle; be patient, bearing with one another in love.
Ephesians 4:2
Yet again, our memory verse has been put to use. Put on the full armor of God (Eph. 6:11): I think we are doing that in many ways. Thank you Lord for this powerful provision!
Only By God's Grace...can I survive the big ash mess of Mt. Haas eruptions and be a loving Mommy.
Callie Ann
Thursday, March 10, 2011
A friend loves at all times.
A friend loves at all times, and a brother is born for a time of adversity.
Proverbs 17:17
Our family has been blessed with amazing friends! When I fall down, they are there to pick me up. When I need advice, they are a phone call away. When I am happy, they share in my joy. When I am in anguish, they share in my sorrow. When one child is hospitalized, they welcome the others as a part of their household for a short while. When I have delivered babies, they bring me delicious food to my door. When I need to take one child to the emergency room, a friend arrives ten minutes later ready to watch over my other three children.
The emergency room trip happened this evening. Kevlie Ann had fallen off the trampoline and landed on her shoulder. Thankfully, there are no broken bones, but it is sprained pretty badly. She will have lots of pain for awhile and may take several weeks to heal. I am grateful because it could have been so much worse. The friend heroine of this story was Jennie; however, our family has been helped by so many.
I have had so many friends readily available in all of my "crisis" moments. I know that I could not possibly list all of the friends we have depended on without inadvertantly leaving some off the list. We are so very thankful of each of you, and I hope you are not offended that I have not given you due credit in this blog. Although, I feel I must mention sweet Molly. She has been one that has allowed my son to take up residence at her home for multiple nights at a time this past year. This is not always an easy feat especially because she has another 9 year old boy at her home. (Jennie and Molly are just fresh on my heart from recent events.)
I have depended on my friendships so much over the past 7 months. There have also been other seasons where we have been extra dependent...2008 comes to mind. I feel like I owe so many for all of the ways they have served and loved our family. I really do not like the feeling of being dependent; however, the Lord designed relationships to be that way. We are to be dependent on one another, to carry each other's burdens, and love at all times. Independence can lead to isolation, selfishness, rebellion, and deprivation of true and deep relationship. To be dependent allows for a transparency that brings true, deep and meaningful relationship. It also means allowing yourself to be vulnerable.
Just now I am even reminded of my relationship with the Lord. Am I completely dependent on Him? Or am I focused on myself and in rebellion? Am I transparent and vulnerable? Do I lay my burdens on Him because His yoke is easy and His burden is light? Do I praise Him because He is Worthy of my worship and praise? Do I serve Him with a heart of thanksgiving? Am I in true, deep, and meaningful relationship with my Heavenly Father who is my Creator, Sustainer, and Redeemer? Are you?
I had a similar conversation with a friend a few days ago talking about our relationship with our Father. We both found it interesting how we feel so much better, handle tough situations better, love better...you get the point...EVERYTHING BETTER when we are in true, deep, and meaningful relationship with our Father! I know that I use to think I was in relationship when I was not. Tonight I am reminded to take inventory and answer the above questionairre to make sure I am in true, deep, and meaningful relationship with Him. Why do we sometimes fall off the wagon when we know everything is better on it? Why do I repeatedly have to confess failure in this area? Why do I insist on learning the hard way? I do not deserve it, but I am so incredibly thankful for His Grace!
I am also thankful that my relationship with the Father can be replicated here on earth. We are given daily examples of meaningful relationships through marriage, family and friends. He also knew that relationships would not be easy. We would not always get along and agree on everything. He also knew jealousy and miscommunication would occur. This is where he instructs us on forgiveness, mercy, grace, and love. He even gave us the best example of all...Jesus Christ.
Only By God's Grace...
Callie Ann
Testing, Testing, 1,2,3
After reflecting back on my post from yesterday, I am feeling the need to clarify a few things. I guess that stems mainly from my joyful comments. I am not anywhere near perfect. I do not have my act together most of the time. I am human and have down times and moments of weakness like any other human being. I am not joyful 100% of the time, but my percentages are improving. It has taken me a long time to be content with where I am and with what God is doing in our lives, but I am now truly content. That contentment is what leads to joy. If I had not gone through that painful process, I would not be able to honestly tell you that I am joyful. I am not sure Kevin has reached the joyful stage yet. Correction: He is joyful a lot of the time, but maybe he is still working on his shooting percentage. I believe this is because he is the provider for the family and carries a heavy burden. However, I must admit he is a lot closer to this pure joy than he was several years ago. Nevertheless, being joyful really has nothing to do with whether or not I have it all together. I am choosing to live this way instead of in misery or just pretending to be happy. I can choose to be happy with the circumstances I am given. Happiness is a choice. Sometimes it is a hard one to make, and other times it is quite easy. My family deserves and needs a more joyful Mommy. This goes the other way too. I am able to enjoy my family more if I am joyful.
Speaking of choosing happiness and being joyful. I was tested this morning. Kevin usually takes the kids to school, and I am so thankful for this act of service that he lovingly does for me. I have had to do this task most mornings the past two weeks. The worst part is that I have to load up all four children to make the "quick" trip. Most of the time this means waking the sleeping baby. Is there not a rule or law that says to never wake a sleeping baby? Well, I have been quite successful with this task until this morning.
I will say that the testing actually happened before we ever left the house. Calvin asked ever so politely if we could leave a little early and stop by the Shell for a breakfast treat. He explained that his sweet sister, Kevlie Ann, wanted to buy breakfast for us. This was an interesting test because 99% of the time my response would be no. Anyone who knows me well knows that I am a stickler for healthy choices for my children. I am not so great at this myself as it is so hard to change old habits, but I want better for them. I rarely let them drink sodas, unless it is a party. I do not allow much sugar, and I try to stay away from candy unless it is a holiday or grandparent treat. So, naturally, why would I agree to stop today and allow them to purchase donuts and cinnamon rolls? I do not know except that I decided to be the "nice mom" today. I hesitated before saying yes, but then quickly realized that it had been a long time since I had said yes to such request. (Now Daddy is a push-over in this department. As long as he will reap some benefit from this breakfast splurge, then he will go for it much more often than me. I would say he is closer to a 75%er. I know that does not seem like a great drop from the 99% no to 75% no, but the kids have learned how to work it.)
Test 1: passed.
The only problem I saw with this plan and the "yes" committment I had made was that we would need to leave a little early. What is "a little" early? Actually, what is early? Since children entered my life, early rarely happens. I hate it. I know hate is a strong word, but I really do hate being late. I hate being on time. I would rather be early and not rushed. I have tried everything. I have tried getting up extra early, but then there is too much extra time and I am not sure where it all goes. I have tried setting the clocks 5 minutes ahead. They are now set 10 minutes ahead. This does not work because I can do the math, and I know how many times I can press snooze. Basically, I can get myself ready, but I am not good at the allowing for catastrophes like poo, meltdowns, lost keys, or just plain stuff. There are times when I have it all together, and we are early. I am quite proud of this accomplishment when it happens, and I celebrate it. I often reflect on it and think, "wow, that was not hard at all." However, even though it was not hard, I cannot for the life of me figure out how I did it so that it could be successfully replicated on a daily basis. But today...we left a little early.
Test 2: passed.
Now a little early meant that I wore my jammies (that did not match) underneath a sweatshirt jacket. I threw on my glasses because there would be no time for contacts. I slipped on flip flops. I did take an extra 15 seconds or so to reassemble my ponytail so that I did not look totally like the just hopped out of bed Momma. (I know this really does not fool anyone, but it makes me feel better.) The twins were ready and excited. They had pep talked Colton so he was excited about donuts. (Colton is a night owl like me. He really prefers to sleep in and wake up on his own in the mornings.) I grabbed Kylee and put her in the carseat. No milk and not even a diaper change. (I can read all of this and see a successful plan for being early; however, I just do not think this would work on a consistent basis. Or at a minimum we probably would not have very many places to go because we would not have very many friends in this hippy-hobo state we looked this morning.) Regardless, we were on our way along with the rest of the world and morning traffic. We live about a mile and a half away from the Shell. About a mile down the road, the van shuts down. According to my gas guage, I should have had at least 20 more miles. I had planned to get gas on my way back home and not at the Shell. I really thought at this moment that it was not a gas problem. I remained calm and collected and even, yes, you know it, JOYFUL. I was laughing at the situation. I was praising the Lord that I had actually left a little early. I was praising the Lord that I had said yes to the donuts. I was desperately praying that we could coast and make it to the gas station. As we were coasting, I could tell the people behind me were not at all impressed with my slow, cautious driving. Maybe they were not as early as we were. We coasted our way to the entrance of the station, and I had to really press on the breaks to be able to make the turn. This is so hard without power steering! Unfortunately, this slowed the van enough that it did not make it to the pump. I then proceeded to jump out of the van in my hippy-hobo attire and push the van. I pushed and pushed while I am sure others were being quite entertained. I mean traveling circuses are very entertaining! I stopped and decided that I was probably close enough for the pump to reach. It was at this point when I had placed it in park that a very kind man told me he would push it the rest of the way for me. He was at the pump next to me. I am not sure what was going through his mind while I was pushing; nevertheless, I was thankful, embarassed, but appreciative for his good deed for the day! The kids were still able to get donuts. I decided after all of that I needed and deserved a Dr. Pepper. And because we had left a little early, the kids still had 5 minutes to spare when we pulled into the school driveway.
Test 3: passed.
I would say that I passed with flying colors. It does not always happen this way. There are many times that I would have totally lost it once the coasting began. Moreover, it would have been even more stressful if I had not answered a simple yes to a simple question from a loving son. Praise the Lord that this time I did not lose it, and it was a great lesson for the kids. They were able to walk into school joyful, instead of stressed and in foul moods because of the way Mommy reacted. This reminds me of a song This Is The Stuff by Francesca Battistelli that speaks directly to my stage in life right now. I think all of the "stuff" in the song has happened to me. I know that I could have written at least 4 more verses for her. I mean it does not even include the running out of gas example of the stuff He uses.
Enjoy singing along!
Only By God's Grace...
I am joyful and blessed beyond measure even through the stuff.
Much Love,
Callie Ann
Speaking of choosing happiness and being joyful. I was tested this morning. Kevin usually takes the kids to school, and I am so thankful for this act of service that he lovingly does for me. I have had to do this task most mornings the past two weeks. The worst part is that I have to load up all four children to make the "quick" trip. Most of the time this means waking the sleeping baby. Is there not a rule or law that says to never wake a sleeping baby? Well, I have been quite successful with this task until this morning.
I will say that the testing actually happened before we ever left the house. Calvin asked ever so politely if we could leave a little early and stop by the Shell for a breakfast treat. He explained that his sweet sister, Kevlie Ann, wanted to buy breakfast for us. This was an interesting test because 99% of the time my response would be no. Anyone who knows me well knows that I am a stickler for healthy choices for my children. I am not so great at this myself as it is so hard to change old habits, but I want better for them. I rarely let them drink sodas, unless it is a party. I do not allow much sugar, and I try to stay away from candy unless it is a holiday or grandparent treat. So, naturally, why would I agree to stop today and allow them to purchase donuts and cinnamon rolls? I do not know except that I decided to be the "nice mom" today. I hesitated before saying yes, but then quickly realized that it had been a long time since I had said yes to such request. (Now Daddy is a push-over in this department. As long as he will reap some benefit from this breakfast splurge, then he will go for it much more often than me. I would say he is closer to a 75%er. I know that does not seem like a great drop from the 99% no to 75% no, but the kids have learned how to work it.)
Test 1: passed.
The only problem I saw with this plan and the "yes" committment I had made was that we would need to leave a little early. What is "a little" early? Actually, what is early? Since children entered my life, early rarely happens. I hate it. I know hate is a strong word, but I really do hate being late. I hate being on time. I would rather be early and not rushed. I have tried everything. I have tried getting up extra early, but then there is too much extra time and I am not sure where it all goes. I have tried setting the clocks 5 minutes ahead. They are now set 10 minutes ahead. This does not work because I can do the math, and I know how many times I can press snooze. Basically, I can get myself ready, but I am not good at the allowing for catastrophes like poo, meltdowns, lost keys, or just plain stuff. There are times when I have it all together, and we are early. I am quite proud of this accomplishment when it happens, and I celebrate it. I often reflect on it and think, "wow, that was not hard at all." However, even though it was not hard, I cannot for the life of me figure out how I did it so that it could be successfully replicated on a daily basis. But today...we left a little early.
Test 2: passed.
Now a little early meant that I wore my jammies (that did not match) underneath a sweatshirt jacket. I threw on my glasses because there would be no time for contacts. I slipped on flip flops. I did take an extra 15 seconds or so to reassemble my ponytail so that I did not look totally like the just hopped out of bed Momma. (I know this really does not fool anyone, but it makes me feel better.) The twins were ready and excited. They had pep talked Colton so he was excited about donuts. (Colton is a night owl like me. He really prefers to sleep in and wake up on his own in the mornings.) I grabbed Kylee and put her in the carseat. No milk and not even a diaper change. (I can read all of this and see a successful plan for being early; however, I just do not think this would work on a consistent basis. Or at a minimum we probably would not have very many places to go because we would not have very many friends in this hippy-hobo state we looked this morning.) Regardless, we were on our way along with the rest of the world and morning traffic. We live about a mile and a half away from the Shell. About a mile down the road, the van shuts down. According to my gas guage, I should have had at least 20 more miles. I had planned to get gas on my way back home and not at the Shell. I really thought at this moment that it was not a gas problem. I remained calm and collected and even, yes, you know it, JOYFUL. I was laughing at the situation. I was praising the Lord that I had actually left a little early. I was praising the Lord that I had said yes to the donuts. I was desperately praying that we could coast and make it to the gas station. As we were coasting, I could tell the people behind me were not at all impressed with my slow, cautious driving. Maybe they were not as early as we were. We coasted our way to the entrance of the station, and I had to really press on the breaks to be able to make the turn. This is so hard without power steering! Unfortunately, this slowed the van enough that it did not make it to the pump. I then proceeded to jump out of the van in my hippy-hobo attire and push the van. I pushed and pushed while I am sure others were being quite entertained. I mean traveling circuses are very entertaining! I stopped and decided that I was probably close enough for the pump to reach. It was at this point when I had placed it in park that a very kind man told me he would push it the rest of the way for me. He was at the pump next to me. I am not sure what was going through his mind while I was pushing; nevertheless, I was thankful, embarassed, but appreciative for his good deed for the day! The kids were still able to get donuts. I decided after all of that I needed and deserved a Dr. Pepper. And because we had left a little early, the kids still had 5 minutes to spare when we pulled into the school driveway.
Test 3: passed.
I would say that I passed with flying colors. It does not always happen this way. There are many times that I would have totally lost it once the coasting began. Moreover, it would have been even more stressful if I had not answered a simple yes to a simple question from a loving son. Praise the Lord that this time I did not lose it, and it was a great lesson for the kids. They were able to walk into school joyful, instead of stressed and in foul moods because of the way Mommy reacted. This reminds me of a song This Is The Stuff by Francesca Battistelli that speaks directly to my stage in life right now. I think all of the "stuff" in the song has happened to me. I know that I could have written at least 4 more verses for her. I mean it does not even include the running out of gas example of the stuff He uses.
Enjoy singing along!
Only By God's Grace...
I am joyful and blessed beyond measure even through the stuff.
Much Love,
Callie Ann
Tuesday, March 8, 2011
A Mento Moment
Where do I begin after a 3 week blog vacation? I'm not sure. I kind of feel like I am so behind because I have had so many blogs running through my head that I have not posted. It is really humbling to have to admit the reason I have not blogged. I suppose I could go on and pretend that it is all because I just have not had the time to blog or we were too busy, etc. However, that would fall into the category of lying, which I absolutely abhor. Furthermore, it would fall into becoming translucent on the verge of opaque, and my goal here is transparency.
Being self-employed and starting your own company requires a daily stepping out on faith. Especially with these economic times and during the growing pain beginnings of a new company. Tough times call for tough decisions. One of the decisions we made this past month was that there were other bills that were more important for the life of our family than our home internet. Let's see, like food on the table, gas in the car, diapers for the baby, medicine, electricity...well, I'm sure the picture has been painted. It even makes it rougher when your chief laborer (aka co-owner) goes down extremely ill for a week. There is no paid sick time when you are building your own company. We have learned a lot over the past year and half through the good times and rough times. As well as the times when you question the Lord and ask if this is really what He wants us to be doing. I am happy to report that He has repeatedly confirmed that we are following His Will for this time in our lives. We have also learned that during the good times to never get comfortable and complacent. We must always be as prepared for what is ahead and that means becoming better stewards of the gifts that we are given.
Previously, I shared one of the lessons learned during this transition that required major change. Cooking and eating at home. I will report that this continues to be a blessing and pure joy to our family. Everyone does not always love the menu choices, but I am starting to create a growing list of favorites. There have been other lessons that I am pretty certain will become future blog posts. It seems that writing this blog is becoming another lesson...a lesson of humility and shedding the false cloak of pride. This can be painful, but it also so refreshing to be real. In my study of His Word last week, I blindly came across Hebrews 12 discussing how "the Lord disciplines those he loves" (vs. 6). I believe that we are being disciplined.
Being self-employed and starting your own company requires a daily stepping out on faith. Especially with these economic times and during the growing pain beginnings of a new company. Tough times call for tough decisions. One of the decisions we made this past month was that there were other bills that were more important for the life of our family than our home internet. Let's see, like food on the table, gas in the car, diapers for the baby, medicine, electricity...well, I'm sure the picture has been painted. It even makes it rougher when your chief laborer (aka co-owner) goes down extremely ill for a week. There is no paid sick time when you are building your own company. We have learned a lot over the past year and half through the good times and rough times. As well as the times when you question the Lord and ask if this is really what He wants us to be doing. I am happy to report that He has repeatedly confirmed that we are following His Will for this time in our lives. We have also learned that during the good times to never get comfortable and complacent. We must always be as prepared for what is ahead and that means becoming better stewards of the gifts that we are given.
Previously, I shared one of the lessons learned during this transition that required major change. Cooking and eating at home. I will report that this continues to be a blessing and pure joy to our family. Everyone does not always love the menu choices, but I am starting to create a growing list of favorites. There have been other lessons that I am pretty certain will become future blog posts. It seems that writing this blog is becoming another lesson...a lesson of humility and shedding the false cloak of pride. This can be painful, but it also so refreshing to be real. In my study of His Word last week, I blindly came across Hebrews 12 discussing how "the Lord disciplines those he loves" (vs. 6). I believe that we are being disciplined.
Our fathers disciplined us for a little while as they thought best; but God disciplines us for our good, that we may share in his holiness. No discipline seems pleasant at the time, but painful. Later on, however, it produces a harvest of righteousness and peace for those who have been trained by it.
Hebrews 12:10-11
I am going to find the joy (my current theme word) and good in the midst of the discipline, for it is going to produce a harvest of righteousness and peace. We are in the process of refinement. We all have heard and know this story of the refining process for precious metals, but they always are so much more beautiful and brilliant in the end. I have also learned to be content with what I have. As I read further into the next chapter of Hebrews, the Lord kindly reminded me of that. It seems that when times are tough, my flesh wants to covet what others have. It is not that I really want what others have; it is just that I do not want to have to worry about bills. I must say, though, that when this worry is present or worry about when our next project is going to roll in is when I have to completely rely on my Sustainer.
Keep your lives free from the love of money and be content with what you have because God said, "Never will I leave you, never will I forsake you."
Hebrews 13:5
I am content with what we have. We are so much better off than so many others and not only in material or monetary ways. We have known several families in the past few weeks and months that are having to deal with life decisions. This has really put our current situation into perspective. I know that several of them would gladly trade places to not have to be facing the tough trials they are dealing with. What I am going through may be stressful at times, but it is nothing compared to what others are enduring this very moment. This changes my heart and prayers from a desperate plea and feeling of neediness to a grateful heart full of an over-abundance of blessings that we do not even deserve. Even with this change of heart, my God is still so good to remind me that after I have suffered a little while, [He] will himself restore me and make me strong, firm and steadfast (1 Peter 5:10). Now that is pure joy.
Now to lighten it up a bit...
I was unable to post our verse that we began on March 1st for our family scripture memory. The Lord has now given me quite a list to choose from; however, the decision is never made until that day. Well, March 1st was a doozy. It was not a horrible day, but the ending just was not very nice. This led us to the following verse. It is a longer one that, to be honest, I can only quote in pieces; however, it is a good one for all of the sibling and daddy/son rivalry we have going on at times. We still have a week to get it down pat. (I think we will be writing it several times or making up a song...maybe I will have the kids make up a rap for it. They would have a lot of fun with that.)
Get rid of all bitterness, rage, and anger, brawling and slander, along with every form of malice. Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other just as in Christ God forgave you.
Ephesians 4:31-32
I also was going to share our Mento Moment tonight. Mimi and the kids have been corresponding with one another through the snail mail. Something about receiving mail as a child just exudes happiness and squealing. Too bad it does not get to stay this way as an adult; this is just another one of those fringe benefits of being an innocent child. Mimi has provided the kids with some stamps, and they have just as much fun writing back and getting to walk down to the mailbox to send it off. They also really enjoy the simple things in life. In one small package she sent them each a bag of skittles. They LOVED this! Tonight, however, all she had with her while she was at the post office was the remnants of her Mento package. There were 3 left. She selflessly sent them to Calvin, Kevlie Ann, and Colton. They were thrilled! They did not even care that they each only were to receive one mento. It was perfect timing because we happened to open the mail just before bedtime so to them it was a sweet treat surprise to be consumed before bedtime. It was so sweet to watch because Calvin passed them out, and they were just kind of staring at them and smiling. They decided to all eat them together on the count of 3. One, two, three...they all popped them in their mouths. A serene, quiet, and content Mento moment commensed. I was the recipient of 3 minty-fresh goodnight kisses!
Only By God's Grace
Joyfully,
Callie Ann
P.S. Just in case you were wondering...
My facebook posts have been being made from my phone, which is not an efficient blogging apparatus at the moment.
P.S. Just in case you were wondering...
My facebook posts have been being made from my phone, which is not an efficient blogging apparatus at the moment.
Tuesday, February 22, 2011
Getting fit really does not include homemade brownies.
I made stew tonight from the leftover pot roast from last night. So while the stew was stewing, a sweet-tooth was brewing, as well as some tea. The only thing sweet I had to make were some key lime bars which have to set up in the frig for 8 hours. That would just not work. So what is a girl to do? I figured out that I had all of the ingredients to make brownies from scratch! And so I quickly whipped it up which took about the same amount of time as a box recipe. I must add that the stew was delish as well as the homemade brownies!
This is also a day I received my bridesmaid dress in the mail for a wedding the end of May. It is hard to place orders for these types of things after you have had a baby when your size 7 months later can be so different. However, I cannot have sweet-tooths creeping up on me if I expect to be any smaller. The dress works now, but I would like to be even more comfortable. I would like to be more fit. I was well on my way to getting fit and shedding all of the previous remaining baby pounds when I was surprised by my pregnancy with Kylee. That put it all to a grinding halt. It is time to get back into gear! And dang those brownies.
I really love to work out! I do not like to be hot, but I love to sweat! Is that an oxymoron or what? Let me clarify, I love work-out sweat. I do not like the trying to look cute, but not because of sweat. I am not ready for summer, but now I am digressing. The problem is getting back into routine and not allowing me to talk myself out of it. I have been establishing routines for the rest of my life so now it is time to add this in. Kevin and I purchased Insanity back in August with great intentions. We managed to put it off over and over again because...well I am not sure of all of the excuses. I know part of it was lack of sleep, the newborn baby kind, which is a semi-legitimate excuse in my book. I think a bigger part of it was fear of how bad of shape we both truly were in, and knowing that we were going to have to literally go through some growing pains...err, workout pains. We actually did the first day - fit test - two weeks ago, and we were both gasping. We have justified that we were not really in that bad of shape because both us were flu-like sick the rest of that week. Surely we performed badly because of the illness our body was already trying to fight. However, the truth is that we have not turned it on since. Can you say fear...again?
The other part of this equation is that I have had a gym membership that I have paid for all of these months and not used. The waste of money here just drives me crazy. I love going to the gym, and I have friends that I go with. So why have I not gone? Well, here are even more excuses. Childcare. Yes, there is childcare and it is free, but I really do not like the ratio. I also know that Kylee requires attention. In addition, I am also leary of all of the sickness going around right now. I must be such a responsible Mommy to keep my little ones from getting exposed, right? Wow, this is downright comical and prejudice. I take them to church and Bible Study where they can also get just as exposed to illness.
The moral of the story is that I must stop making excuses, pump myself up for no pain, no gain, and get up and get moving. Not only will I get fit, but I will feel so much better in the process. Exercise makes me happy, feel good, have less headaches, and gives me much more energy. So here's to working out like a mad woman and drinking lots of water in the process.
Only By God's Grace
With Much Love,
Callie Ann
This is also a day I received my bridesmaid dress in the mail for a wedding the end of May. It is hard to place orders for these types of things after you have had a baby when your size 7 months later can be so different. However, I cannot have sweet-tooths creeping up on me if I expect to be any smaller. The dress works now, but I would like to be even more comfortable. I would like to be more fit. I was well on my way to getting fit and shedding all of the previous remaining baby pounds when I was surprised by my pregnancy with Kylee. That put it all to a grinding halt. It is time to get back into gear! And dang those brownies.
I really love to work out! I do not like to be hot, but I love to sweat! Is that an oxymoron or what? Let me clarify, I love work-out sweat. I do not like the trying to look cute, but not because of sweat. I am not ready for summer, but now I am digressing. The problem is getting back into routine and not allowing me to talk myself out of it. I have been establishing routines for the rest of my life so now it is time to add this in. Kevin and I purchased Insanity back in August with great intentions. We managed to put it off over and over again because...well I am not sure of all of the excuses. I know part of it was lack of sleep, the newborn baby kind, which is a semi-legitimate excuse in my book. I think a bigger part of it was fear of how bad of shape we both truly were in, and knowing that we were going to have to literally go through some growing pains...err, workout pains. We actually did the first day - fit test - two weeks ago, and we were both gasping. We have justified that we were not really in that bad of shape because both us were flu-like sick the rest of that week. Surely we performed badly because of the illness our body was already trying to fight. However, the truth is that we have not turned it on since. Can you say fear...again?
The other part of this equation is that I have had a gym membership that I have paid for all of these months and not used. The waste of money here just drives me crazy. I love going to the gym, and I have friends that I go with. So why have I not gone? Well, here are even more excuses. Childcare. Yes, there is childcare and it is free, but I really do not like the ratio. I also know that Kylee requires attention. In addition, I am also leary of all of the sickness going around right now. I must be such a responsible Mommy to keep my little ones from getting exposed, right? Wow, this is downright comical and prejudice. I take them to church and Bible Study where they can also get just as exposed to illness.
The moral of the story is that I must stop making excuses, pump myself up for no pain, no gain, and get up and get moving. Not only will I get fit, but I will feel so much better in the process. Exercise makes me happy, feel good, have less headaches, and gives me much more energy. So here's to working out like a mad woman and drinking lots of water in the process.
Only By God's Grace
With Much Love,
Callie Ann
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